When you feel finding someone is the next step..

thinkingladyBy Grace Riccordi

At what age does a single woman stop being young, free and independent and feel the urgency to settle down? It’s not that that the biological clock is ticking or that I’m lonely but it just seems that finding a man and settling down is the next step. In our early 20’s we were content with drinking and dancing the night away with friends but now it seems quiet nights in and a warm companion are more essential. Don’t get me wrong I still like the odd tipple with friends but when half of them are settled down or have children, it seems society is subtly telling me to catch up.

To be part of a couple has been imbedded in our minds for years. Three hundred year old literature even suggests that being man and wife is the key element of life.

If you look back at the Jane Austen era, she suggests if you were single at 20, you were labeled a spinster. The first line of Pride and Prejudice reads: ‘It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.’ (Austen 1813) Maybe I just meet the men not in possession of a good fortune.

There are 30 million women in the UK and 29 million men (Kgb Answers 2011, How many women live in Britain). So hypothetically a million of us will be forced to leave the country just to find a man…and then there’s the potential language barrier and you’ll probably break up because you argued too much over whose moving to whose country anyway.

I am content with being a singleton at the borderline scary age of 30, I have a great job, great friends and wonderful social life but it can’t be denied that I always keep a look out for a guy. It’s like sleeping with one eye open, the prospect of meeting a man is always on the radar.

It seems every other aspect of my life is great, especially my career but when it comes to finding that significant other should I wait for fate or do I approach it head on like I did with my career? My job didn’t just fall into my lap and it’s the best thing to happen to me so maybe I have to approach the male market more aggressively; speed dating, online dating and maybe even blind dating. Maybe the change in technology and networking can help shift Austen’s theory and help me prove that finding rather than waiting for love is possible.


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